Things Self help Books Never tell You

I came across an article in a magazine today that rather tickled my fancy! It is called 'Things Self Help Books never tell You', here are a few I thought particularly amusing.

* When you go on a diet, you will lose all the weight from your boobs before a single ounce goes of your thighs. (Actually I would not mind that scenario as I have a veritable bouncy castle for a bust, I also have very small feet as nothing grows in the shade.)

*Drinking 8 to ten glasses of water a day means you can never watch a film all the way through or sleep through the entire night. (Yep, tell me about that one)

*Eating only when your hungry is a habit we abandoned thousands of years ago- along with cave paintings and dragging one another home by the hair. ( Tell that to Gillian McKieth, the "I am so smug" 'You are What you Eat' author)

*Ignoring your inner critic is not a good idea after an entire bottle of wine and the first three chords of 'I Will Survive'. ( not really likely to happen to me, unless I have to hum of course)

*It's not a good idea to attempt body brushing in front of a mirror while naked, it looks as if you are dragging a fork through blancmange.

*Building up you confidence by starting conversations with people you do not know, will guarantee you a seat alone on the bus or train.

* Having your hair style changed radically will make your children laugh and you cry for a week ( I have to say I can relate to this one, except my hair made ME laugh for a week)

* Finding your inner child is healing... Unless she turns out to be the spoilt brattish she devil who would send supernanny into retirement.

*If you have time to fold your knickers neatly into drawer dividers, you need to get out more. (My knicker drawer resembles a jumble sale after the hoards have rummaged through it)

* Some stress is actually good for you, it can be energising and creative. (Totally agree with this, I am at my best under a bit of pressure. )

These were taken from January's issue of Good Housekeeping.